Boys And Girls Continued

Boys And Girls Sequel

            The room was quiet; silence only broken by the soft ruffling of the trees outside. I sat starring at my dinner plate, stomach only half full, too petrified to utter the words necessary to ask for more food. The dinner table remained quiet as the grave. I hid my shaking hands from view and tried somewhat successfully to fight back tears. I opened my mouth wide to speak but my pitiful attempt to break the silence was only rewarded by a small squeak that sent Laird into a fit of laughter. My cheeks reddened and a single tear slid down my face. Embarrassed, I rushed to dry my face with a napkin and once again focused my gaze on my empty plate.

           

            Only minutes ago I had let flora run through that gate and sent Laird and father on a wild goose chase. I don’t know what I was thinking but whatever the reason; I had lost a lot of respect from my family.  Father had said it himself, I’m just a girl. My entire life I tried to prove to my parents that I could be more than just a girl who cooks and cleans. My stupidity had almost erased all hopes of that. I wanted them to understand that I was just as much a hard worker as laird and I could work on the fields just as proficiently as him. The very thought of being cooped up indoors all day, cooking and cleaning sent shivers up my spine. As much respect as I had for my mother, I could not imagine being confined indoors while the men handled all the real work.

            My daze was interrupted by the booming voice of father saying that dinner was over and that it was time to clean up. He strolled out of the room and his thundering footsteps could be heard as he walked the creaking stairs up to my parents’ bedroom. Laird also exited the room skipping eagerly as he always did. Cleaning up was of course not for men and would always be handled by the women. That left only me and mother in the kitchen. Mother turned on the water as she began the dishes. I scrambled to my feet and began to clear the table. Once the table was cleared, I made my way over to mother to help dry the dishes. The dishes were done in silence but my mother’s eyes never strayed from me the entire time. At last, everything was finished and my mother turned off the tap. I turned to leave but mother called me back. She stated in a quiet but firm voice, “Kate. We need to talk.”

            It felt like my veins were filled with ice as I awaited the flurries of verbal bombardment that were sure to come. I was surprised that when mother spoke it was in a soft, calm voice.  “Can you please explain to me why you let flora go?” she said. At first I hesitated, but then I decided to tell her the truth. She was my mother after all and maybe she would understand. I took a deep breath, and relayed my story to her.

 I told her of that aspirations in life were more than working in the house all day. Words came more freely now. I told her how I had taken Laird to the barn and how we had seen Mack being shot. I didn’t realise until now how much that incident had affected me. I understood now why I had not tried to stop Flora. The thought that she too would be shot was too much for me to bear and so I did nothing to stop her. After telling mother all this, I sat down, utterly spent. Mother took a moment to answer but after several seconds she did. “I only wish that you had told me of this sooner. I understand that seeing Mack shot upset you, and I can also understand why you didn’t stop Flora from galloping off. I know it’s hard living on this farm sometimes, but I hope you know that your father and I support you, no matter what you do. You’re a strong girl, and I know that you have dreams outside the farm. I love you Kate and I hope you know that.” I suddenly felt a burst of love for the women who bore and raised me. I hugged her and exited the room. I sat on my bed and for the first time In several hours I felt happiness wash over me. As I looked at the starry sky through my window, I thought to myself, maybe being a girl isn’t such a bad thing after all.